Heard on The Herd earlier this week in response to a survey showing that Washington D.C. is the best place to find single women in the U.S.

“There’s a reason that Condoleeza Rice is single and Maureen Down can’t get a date.”

“A little intelligence is nice, it’s necessary. But if she looks good in Tempe on Friday night, I’ll take that.”

“You can have the policy wonks, I’ll take the spaghetti straps at Senor Froggys.”

Mr. Cowherd also said that he would be less than happy to come home to his girlfriend at night and find that she wants to discuss, say, foreign policy. Faced with that totally unsexy scenario, his response would be something like: “Alrighty then cupcake, I guess it’s back to the internet for porn.”

Maybe he should go to the internet. How about a virtual girlfriend, a computer avatar who could be programmed to limit discussion to acceptable subjects and be her sexy self a good 100% of the time? Failing that, phone sex would be acceptable. Not too much danger of running into the press secretary for the Department of the Interior there.

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