I went to see my trainer Lenny Parracino today to see what we can do about tendonitis in my knee. We corrected my lunge technique and then I endured the usual torture for scar tissue: heat-seeking deep tissue massage in the muscles above the knee that are causing the tendonitis. This why he is called the thumbinator. I cannot believe how much grief and time it takes just to be a shlock E level recreational tennis player. Why do I put up with this?

I was flipping channels last night and came across a piece on HBO?s Real Sex about equestrian erotica: people who like to dress up as ponies ? hooves, elaborate blinders, tails, etc. ? and play out erotic scenes. I am currently reading a how-to book about erotic role play, Fantasy Made Flesh. The author asks you to go back to childhood and remember what kind of things you loved as a child, activities nobody had to ask you to do, games you were obsessed by. These are a fertile source of ideas for erotic roles that might turn you on today. The only obsession I could remember was standing at the bottom of the path and throwing a tennis ball against the steps for hours at a time pretending to be a pitcher or a shortstop or Willie Mays running with his back to the plate and making an impossible catch.

I?m still obsessively playing with a tennis ball. She might be right about those obsessions.